Day 15- exhaustion

There is a thing called diabetes burn-out. It happens and is serious.  We get fed up with doing everything "right" and still getting number that are out of range. We do everything "right" and still get sick, heal slower, get sicker faster, and are considered high risk for certain things. It gets old and tiresome to prick our fingers-that crap can hurt, and it especially sucks if a nurse has to do it because they use "bone-depth" lancets that bleed far much longer and leads to too much blood that oozes for a long time after they get the tin drop needed. We get irritated when our insulin pump infusion sites kink, fail, rip off, and get cut by who knows what, when our omni pods fail for no reason and we waste precious units of insulin, when our vials get dropped and shatter, spilling those life saving droplets all over the floor, when our vials or pens get too hot or cold and no longer work.
It can happen because no matter how hard we fight our bodies, we lose mini battles. Our numbers et to high from every little thing and we must dose massive amounts of insulin to make it get into a safe range. Our numbers go low, and in the middle of the night we lost precious sleep eating or drinking sugar so we don't die, then having to brush our teeth AGAIN so we don't get cavities and put out more money on dental work. The lack of sleep causes our moods to be off sometimes and that can lead to stress which spikes BG, which plays into the vicious cycle of a blood sugar roller coaster.

 We can do everything as prescribed and still have off days and when the off days begin to outnumber the good days, we can feel defeated, worthless, useless, like a drain on our loved ones and guilty for them having to deal with dia-grumpies (my term for bg related asshole moods).

We get burnt out on doing it right and still having results we don't like.

I do not speak for all Type 1 Diabetics, just for myself and others who I imagine might think like myself.

We fight, for our lives, for our health, for understanding and to spread knowledge. We get exhausted and want to give up but we don't.